Multi-generational living has been embraced as a win-win solution for extended families faced with unaffordable retirement accommodation, rising consumer inflation and unemployment. While this can be a smart move, it can also pan out to be something of a challenge. Yael Geffen, CEO of Lew Geffen Sotheby’s International Realty, examines this growing trend and offers some pointers to make this living arrangement work for everyone.
WORDS & PHOTOS: SUPPLIED
Geffen advises that thorough planning and numerous adjustments and compromises are necessary in order for it to work. She says that in the face of the rising cost of living, a gloomy economic outlook, and a scarcity of affordable housing, multi-generational living has emerged as a practical and meaningful solution. But, although bringing together individuals from different age groups under one roof can be a fulfilling experience, it’s not without its challenges.
“Multi-generational living can be a very smart fiscal move as costs become more efficient when shared, and it also fosters family unity and is a very practical way for generations to help each other out, whether it be providing a home or sharing a rung on the property ladder.”
“However, putting two or three generations under one roof can be problematic and for multi-generational living to thrive, careful consideration and intentional efforts are needed to ensure the well-being and harmony of all household members.”
She says that the first step is to take an objective look at your home and assess how well it works for everyone – young and old.
“If your home could be problematic for someone with mobility issues who might have difficulty climbing stairs or getting into a bath, then it might be a better idea to convert an attached garage into a self-contained flat as everything will be accessible and on one level. And, if there is a choice of ground floor and first floor bedrooms, allocate the rooms on the lower level to the older generation even if they are still very mobile as they will remain accessible as your family ages. Also, having bedrooms on both floors with the youngsters upstairs, will create a natural separation between generations.”
Make it work for you: Multi-generational living can be an enriching experience and a cost-saving living arrangement that benefits all, but forethought is required.
Once practicalities have been addressed, Geffen says that taking note of these factors can make multi-generational living work for everyone:
-
Open communication channels
Communication is the foundation of any successful household, and in a multi-generational setting, it becomes even more critical. Encourage open and honest communication among all family members and create a space where everyone feels comfortable expressing their needs, concerns, and expectations.
Regular family meetings can be a valuable forum for discussing shared responsibilities, financial matters, and personal boundaries.
-
Define shared spaces and personal boundaries
Clearly define shared spaces and personal boundaries within the home. Each generation may have different lifestyles, routines, and preferences so establishing designated areas for communal activities and personal spaces allows everyone to coexist harmoniously.
Encourage mutual respect for these boundaries to foster a sense of autonomy and privacy for each household member.
-
Financial transparency
Financial discussions can be sensitive but are crucial for the success of multi-generational living. Establish transparency regarding financial contributions, expenses, and savings goals and clearly outline how costs will be shared, taking into account the varying financial capacities of different generations.
Transparency helps avoid misunderstandings and ensures that everyone contributes fairly to the household’s financial well-being.
-
Shared responsibilities
Distribute household responsibilities equitably among all family members. From chores to caregiving responsibilities, sharing the load fosters a sense of teamwork and prevents any one individual from feeling overwhelmed or resentful.
Rotating responsibilities and establishing a schedule for tasks can help maintain balance and ensure that everyone plays a part in the smooth functioning of the household.
-
Respect different generational perspectives
Multi-generational living brings together diverse perspectives shaped by different life experiences. Encourage an environment of mutual respect and understanding and embrace the opportunity for intergenerational learning and sharing of wisdom.
Recognise that each generation has unique strengths and contributions to offer, creating a rich tapestry of experiences within the household.
-
Create intentional shared activities
Foster a sense of togetherness by creating intentional shared activities. Whether it’s regular family meals, game nights, or outings, shared experiences strengthen familial bonds.
Be mindful of the varied interests and preferences of different generations, ensuring that activities are inclusive and enjoyable for everyone. These moments of connection contribute to a positive and cohesive family dynamic.
-
Flexibility and adaptability
Life is dynamic, and circumstances can change so try to cultivate a spirit of flexibility and adaptability within the household and recognise that each family member may face different challenges and stages of life.
Being open to adjustments and embracing change with a positive attitude allows the family to navigate transitions smoothly and support each other through various life events.
-
Provide individual support
Recognise the unique needs of each family member and provide individual support where necessary. Whether it’s childcare, eldercare, or emotional support, understanding and addressing the specific needs of each generation contribute to a nurturing and caring environment.
This approach fosters a sense of security and well-being for all household members.
-
Encourage independence
While multi-generational living promotes interdependence, it’s also essential to encourage individual independence. Support younger family members in pursuing their goals and establishing their independence. Similarly, respect the autonomy and preferences of older family members.
Balancing interdependence with individual freedom contributes to a healthy and harmonious living arrangement.
-
Seek professional guidance
In some cases, seeking professional guidance can be beneficial and family counsellors or therapists experienced in navigating multi-generational dynamics can provide valuable insights and tools for effective communication and conflict resolution during retirement.
“Multi-generational living can be a rewarding and enriching experience when approached with intention, communication, and flexibility,” concludes Geffen.
“Ultimately, it provides a wonderful opportunity for generations to connect, so embrace the strengths that each family member brings to the table and enjoy a fulfilling journey of shared growth and treasure the time together.”
